She's coming home today!!!!!!! I can't wait to pick her up at the airport!!!!!
Seven days and she will be home, and it will be our home again!
I can't wait. I've painted, constructed, stained and dug, but it isn't worth anything unless it is appreciated by the one you are doing it for. Not only will I be overjoyed to see her, but that we can continue working on our home together-- in many ways, a parallel to our lives together. There are leaks and pitfalls, things that need painting and floors to sweep, but there is also so much laughter, comfort and joy that all the work become worth it. Like a good home, a marriage must be built to last, and I'm looking forward to continue building ours again in person.
Long time no post for me.
Though Pip and I celebrated our anniversary last weekend, I HAD to post a little more.
After I was done with my meeting today I took a trip to CSB and went to the Idzierda House, where Pip lived when we started dating I didn't need to go in, but just being present there gave me the opportunity to sit and think for a moment. Sometimes you need to retrace your steps to understand where you are standing.
I realized how fortunate I am to have Pip in my life. Someone so beautiful, so amazing, whose image stays with me though she is thousands of miles away. Whose energy is contagious, whose laugh is full of joy, whose eyes speak in terms of dreams, journeys and love. She completes me and strives me on to better things. In short, she makes me smile.
I say this because I recognize what we've been through-- our joy from when we started dating to when we were in Monaco, relaxing and enjoying just being around one another and sharing in each other's strengths. Being able to stand gazing at the Paris sky with the one you love, then looking at Pip, in whose eyes reflected the lights of the Eiffel Tower, is an image I will treasure my entire life. When I think of that image, all pain seems to go away-- and I am filled with a sense of peace and love.
What is particularly exciting is being able to continue our enjoyment of our Paris spring in three weeks, when Pip returns. We'll be able to dance in our backyard, much like we did in the Idzierda house one fall evening; Pip will stretch in our living room, like she used to in the Idzierda House; and I will see her smile as I leave a random note for her, much like she used to when I left to go home for the week ahead.
Even now, as I sit an ocean away in random pain from stones in my kidneys, I know that Pip worries about me, and wonders about how I am handling it all. That concern alone helps me to deal with it, as no pain seems bad when you can share it with someone else, and her willingness to absorb it, makes me eternally grateful, and know I found the right person to spend my life with.
So two years down, and a lifetime of love yet to go. In view of our memories, and Pip's return, the best seems yet to come. Thank you, dear, and much lovies!!!!
Randomness of the day (perhaps caused by exhaustion...)
Two random thoughts, completely disconnected from one another:
1.) Wait, we go into Iraq on the premise that there may be WMDs and they have a bad, dictatorial regime; occupy it and depose their leader; bomb the infrastructure and ruin the institutions in the country; but yet, their next door neighbor, who has a history of taking our citizens its hostages, who fought a war in the 80s against our interests, who has clearly expressed nuclear ambitions and an ability to procure them (thanks for pulling out of the non-proliferation treaty-- good one), whose leader is dictatorial, and we can only talk tough with sanctions???
Anybody else find the irony more than a little amusing?
2.) One week before Paris for me, which is good and bad. The bad is that I have to get a lot of stuff done first. But the excitement is well worth pain as I get to spend time with Pip together-- five straight date days which I'm looking forward to being spoiled by from Pip. It's hard to stay focused knowing that she and I will be walking on the Mediteranean sands next weekend, holding hands, watching the sun set over the water. Pip, Ivy's Edge of the Water makes me look forward to that next week!
Ok, I finally did it.
After obsessing about this for way too long, I finally went out and bought a new phone-- a Blackberry 7130e from Verizon. To tell you honestly, I love it. It's sync'd to my email, it has internet access, and in theory, I will be able to remotely access my office desktop (it even has a google earth applet that gives real time maps/satellite photos including even Metro stops in Paris-- damn cool!). I have been struggling to stay organized since my PDA died in December, and this takes the cake-- I feel more productive already!
The phone is really a means of keeping in touch. I am already getting so lazy in the sense that sitting in front of my laptop to pound out an email is tedious. Now, it will be much easier to sit down when I have a few minutes of downtime to write an email on my phone- wherever I am. I long for the day when my cellphone will be fast enough and powerful enough to be my laptop, so I won't have to lug it around all day.
With Pip in France, I am understanding how important it is to keep in touch. I really want to talk to her, or really, just be around her-- and given the mileage between us, but for technology it would not be possible. Skype, email, MSN keep us split-seconds apart instead of an ocean away. It makes this time liveable-- though it gets harder when Pip explores the continent while yours truly explores Menard's.
On a macro scale, we are moving so isolationist as a society that things like email are one of the few threads that keep us together. I have been so spoiled for so long that I have taken it all for granted. But technology helps to rope me back in again! I will be a Crackberry addict!
Sometimes, after one of those days at work where you lose faith in the entire foundation of your career, you just want to go home and know your spouse is there to restore everything. That is what has made it so hard for me to be away from Pip for so long-- no matter how hard she tries, especially trying not to pee anywhere other than in the yard, she can't replace how Pip can just take all those stresses away. Makes me really miss her.
I spent this weekend at a wedding. Really, it felt more like a class reunion. All in one room were symposium classmates, friends whom I used to hang with in my first year, guys who I used to play mafia with; and roommates that have not been together for an extended period since graduation. Most of these people I have not spent significant time with, if any, since graduation. The good part is that we picked up right where we left off. It was great to spend good hang out time with guys that had come in from Washington D.C. and from Milwaukee.
But it got me thinking about age. Here we all are-- feeling young, all still starting our careers-- yet we are five years removed from our undergraduate times. Where did the time go? What happened? Most importantly, what does it mean?
I have to admit, the whole thing got me down. Just yesterday we were kids, with no rush, no cares, no fears, and plans to change the world; five years later, where did it go? We're so interested in kids, in housing, in our jobs and our IRAs-- makes me really want to concentrate on a paper to write or MarioKart for a while-- there is so much purity and enjoyment in that simplicity compared to the complexity that is the upper 20s!
And to think that 20 years from now we'll be celebrating our 25th reunion, and how things will have further changed-- and how really old that would be-- though not much older than my parents today.
It also further makes me realize how special it is to have found someone to share that time with. I'm lucky to have Pip who has pledged to see me through my 20s, 30s, 40s, et al. And she does it in a way that makes me proud to be with her, so that I have the opportunity to see her through the same. In the middle of all the change that age brings us, having the constant of being able to look into her beautiful eyes each morning makes me not fear age 28...or 29.....or even 30.
The rants and ravings of a reasonable person who questions authority and power and enjoys pondering the tough issues.