Pip sometimes questions why I love her. The more I think about it, the more I understand it's a good thing to reevaluate from time to time why you do what you do.
By way of background, I have always seen beauty as far more than skin deep. Beauty is a state of being-- a mindset of appreciation combined with a physical sense of motivation with a generous and true heart.
Truth be told, Pip is the most beautiful woman in the world. Not only is she the most physically attractive woman I know, but she possesses the state of mind of motivation and desire in that, she not only wants to make a difference in the world, that she can and will make that difference in the world. Such goes beyond hope and dreams, as she makes hers reality. She sees potential in this world-- a potential to grow, to succeed, to be vibrant-- that goes well beyond my comprehension and understanding. At once she is physical and metaphysical, present and future. Her mind is ablaze- too quick sometimes to even retrace the logical paths we must go through-- a blessing when the whole world is capable of being conquered.
I see in her eyes a warm woman who knows no true stopping. Sappy, yes; but caringly so-- I'll never forget her eyes when picking up a puppy for the first time-- so loving and protectionate, but full of hopes and dreams for this tiny ball of fur that would be reality for sure. These same eyes seek to ensure her loved ones are treated like she wants to be-- omnipresent and self-sacrificing.
I love her for the fact that the hardest thing for herself is sleep. It is a struggle with the amount, the time, the dreams that will one day become reality. For myself, who struggles to dream, she does enough for both of us.
Her skills are those that are beyond my capability- a joy of performance and free-form, words and sounds, colors and motion. She drives herself to perfection in those fields and accepts nothing less than that. She seeks cohesiveness and community-- we are all one big family and we all share in that love. Her desire to enable opportunities for others yields recurring dividends without gain to herself-- it is love of others and true desire for helping others achieve their best as well.
I often believe I disappoint her-- she seeks perfection in me, and I feel most of the time I fall short of that goal. But I know where I fail she succeeds, and it is comforting to know that I can trust in her to gain where I would not.
In short, she complements me. She completes the circle- while we have different styles and manners, different laughs and smiles, together they create one big completeness. I could see that from the moment I first saw her at CSB-- she was in a play, I was in the audience, and the way she carried herself, even if on stage, I got this feeling. And when we first started dating, I looked in her eyes and could see it clearly then-- I just knew. And when we had our first dance, I looked at her eyes again, twinkling in the light, it was never more apparent. Time and time again I could barely muster the words because they are so powerful when I look into her eyes, I love you.
Lovies, dear. I miss you.